Pimp Master Patty

March 17th marks St. Patrick's Day, the day of the patron saint of Ireland. However, to me, it's a predominately Anglo-Saxon holiday- it's a holiday made up by white people. Tell people that, though, and they flip out. "How racist! That's full of unequality and stereotypes!" No. It is honest, my friends.

I am white. Extremely white. So say, for instance, you saw me wearing a sombrero on Cinco de Mayo- you would probably laugh at "that white guy trying to be Hispanic." Or what if I celebrated the African holiday of Kwansa- you'd probably think I was a little strange. And if I carved a dredel on Hanukkah, you'd think, "What a weird little Protestant." You'd say and do these things because I'm not Hispanic, African, or Jewish. I'm white. Extrememly white. And St. Patrick's day is an extremely white holiday.

Again, this isn't racism. I'm not pledging that white people band together and stop other cultures from wearing dorky green hats and drinking green beer. I love respecting other cultures' holidays. I AM saying that the holiday has been developed primarily by the white culture, i.e. the Irish. It's a historical fact, not a personal opinion. But I mean really, can you think of any other culture on this plant that would be crazy enough to dye the entire Chicago River green? I didn't think so. So in understanding my heritage on this Anglo-Saxon created holiday this year, I strived to better understand my roots and I found that today, they revolve around one guy named Patrick. Big surprise there, huh?

What an awful name- Patrick. Who would want to hang out with a guy named Patty? Maybe a boy named Sue (sorry for the pun). Unfortunately for this boy-wonder, he was captured and sold into slavery before he could change his name. And for six years, he worked as a sheep farm slave in Ireland before running off to a monestary a the tender age of 22. It wasn't until his thirties that he returned to Ireland to preach the Gospel and later became the driving force behind founding Catholicism in Ireland. So, on a holiday remembering a guy a Catholic legend who is responsible for the salvation of an entire country, why the heck do we wear green and pinch people? Doesn't add up.

Many of the ideas of modern St. Patrick's Day are actually derivatives of pagan rituals. That is ironic because the holiday started out originally a Catholic holiday. However, from the mythology of leprechaun to the superstitions of warding off bad spirits by wearing green, this holiday has gradually shifted from the religious holiday that it was to the Hallmark greeting card holiday it is today. In total, most of the traditions of the holiday today are derivitves of ideas and religions from all around the globe with a few exceptions sneaking in. (One of those exceptions would be eating the traditional Irish meal of corn beef and cabbage which I believe should be done away with. Why can't we celebrate it with a steak and loaded potatoes instead of this nasty garbage? I'm sure the Irish still have a few potatoes left over from their famine in 1845; load them up with sour creme and chives, laddy!)

Much like what has happened to the holdiay of St. Patrick's Day, our own personal beliefs are often flooded with the same blend of ideas. What we may mistake as the infalible truth has been fouled up by man's practices no matter if your Protestant, Catholic, New Age, or believe in the Great Speghetti Monster (yes, there is a church for the Flying Speghetti Monster). For instance, the structure of the Christian church service has been derived much from the midevil superstitions of Gregory the Great, aka the first monk to be pope. The Church building itself takes much of its structure from pagan ideaology (for instance, the steeple of a church is a derivitive of the towers anceint Egyptians used to reach towards their gods in the sky). At the root of it, the Bible is still the infallible truth; on the outside, our practices sometimes mimic that of pagan ideas.

With the right heart, there is nothing wrong with tradition. Just like Patty's Day is fun, so traditions can feel very rewarding. With the wrong heart, though, they are a waste of time. So may your St. Patrick's Day be full of fun and maybe even cultural meaning. If you are white, I hope you do your research into the heritage of this Anglo-Saxon, Irish holiday. It's who you are, "me laddy's"; you best know who you are. If your not, may you enjoy the festivities from drinking lots of green beer to dying random stuff green. All people are welcome to have fun. And may you find meaning in whatever you do in life, whether it be in religion or in entertainment.

KB